Terms of Service
Padhna zaroori hai. Kyunki aapne agree kar diya already. 😉
TL;DR: Ye ek parody site hai. Real vote nahi hai. Real election commission se door-door tak koi rishta nahi. Agar aapko lagta hai ki ye asli hai, toh aapko break chahiye.
1. Eligibility
Is site pe vote karne ke liye aapko:
- 18+ saal ka hona zaroori hai. Par agar aap 14 ke hain aur padh rahe hain, toh bhi chalega. Democracy toh sabki hai.
- Indian hona zaroori nahi hai. Kyunki ye fake election hai, bhai.
- Sense of humor hona bohot zaroori hai. Agar nahi hai, toh nikal jao.
2. Voting Rules
- Ek device, ek vote. Do vote karne ki koshish karenge? Fingerprint pakdega. Cockroach nazar se nahi bachta.
- Incognito mode? Haan, kaam karta hai. Par aapko sharam nahi aati?
- VPN se vote kar rahe ho? Accha, international spy lag rahe ho. Hum record kar rahe hain. (Nahi, actually nahi. Par dar lagna chahiye.)
- Ye vote EVM mein nahi jayega. Iska koi real-world impact nahi hai. Relax.
3. Prohibited Activities
Aap ye nahi kar sakte:
- Bot bhej ke 10,000 vote karne ki koshish. Humare paas FingerprintJS hai, tumhara bot nahi chalega.
- Is site ko asli election commission ki site bata ke dusron ko bewakoof banana.
- Politicians ko tag kar ke kehna "Dekho maine aapko vote diya." Ye toh unke liye bhi awkward hoga.
- Server crash karne ki koshish. Free tier pe hain, already crash hone wala hai. Aapko mehnat nahi karni.
4. Intellectual Property
Ye site ka code aap use kar sakte hain, modify kar sakte hain, aur apne WhatsApp group mein bhi share kar sakte hain. Humein koi problem nahi. Bas credit mat dena, hum bhi toh chori kar ke banaye hain. (Just kidding. Thoda.)
5. Disclaimer of Warranties
Ye site "as is" provide ki gayi hai. Iska matlab:
- Kabhi load na ho, toh hum responsible nahi.
- Kabhi results galat dikhaye, toh bhi hum responsible nahi. (Par Supabase responsible hai, unko bolo.)
- Agar aapne vote CJP ko diya aur aapke ghar mein cockroach aa gaye, toh hum responsible nahi. (Coincidence hoga.)
6. Limitation of Liability
Humari maximum liability = ek virtual high-five. Usse zyada mat maango. Humein paise nahi hain. Website free pe banayi hai.
7. Termination
Hum kabhi bhi aapki voting rights suspend kar sakte hain. Reasons:
- Hum mood mein nahi hain.
- Server band ho gaya.
- Aapne kuch aisa bola jo cockroach community ko hurt kiya.
8. Governing Law
Ye terms governed hain by the Law of Common Sense. Court: WhatsApp Group Admin. Judge: Your Uncle Ji.
By continuing to use this site, you agree that satire is the highest form of democracy, that politicians should learn to laugh at themselves, and that you will share this with at least 3 friends. Matlab, nahi karoge toh bhi chalega, par kar do yaar.